Dad: Stop watching anime and go outside!
I’m dropping out of school/life to play disco zoo all day. It’s my one true passion.
I was once going down on a guy and he fell asleep and then I fell asleep and it was so embarrassing because by the time we woke up, class was over and the teacher was just staring at us and shaking her head with the meanest look on her face. It’s like, okay, I get it. You’re disappointed, but that doesn’t mean that you have to watch me sleep-drool all over your son’s wiener. Get a life, lady.
I bought you these flowers because I know that they’re not your favorite and they’re covered in pollen and you have allergies and I figured that they might attract bees and I know that a bee sting could send you into a bee coma or whatever happens when wimps like you get stung by bees.
i bet my tongue is stronger than yours wanna find out